Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
You should frame my arrest warrant.