Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
