Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Help. Why am I so naked?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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