u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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