i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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