Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
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