All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
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