Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
