If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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