I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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