After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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