went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
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