Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
