wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
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