I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Randomize
