I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
vagina is talking i cant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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