So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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