Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
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