I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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