Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize