Soap is not a condiment
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
