Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
