I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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