your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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