It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
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