yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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