Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Randomize
