I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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