i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
