I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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