i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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