Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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