we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
you had me at cake vodka
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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