he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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