Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
