In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize
