Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(309): View more from Illinois

is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore

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(269): View more from Michigan

You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan

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(807): View more from Ontario

I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(313): View more from Michigan

you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.

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(828): View more from North Carolina

If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?

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(281): View more from Texas

I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.

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(720): View more from Colorado

So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".

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(805): View more from California

i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person

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