of course. lets lasso hookers.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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