sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I see more hoeing in ur future
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