first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
