It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.