I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize
