i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
