Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
