I want to stick my p in your. b.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
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This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
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I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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