): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
