If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize