Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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