She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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