dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize